Mapua Easter Fair 2011

I sold four paintings and two rock paintings at this years Mapua Easter Fair. Below is the art painted for the stall. It was a grey and slightly damp day but as always a relaxing atmosphere. It was great to have Trish on the stall too selling her owls and broaches.

Support Vital Dealing With Autism

Opinion, The Nelson Mail 21 April 2011
Autism New Zealand runs a regular coffee group which is a form of therapy for this mother of a six year old daughter with autism spectrum disorder.

Support Vital Dealing With Autism

My six year old daughter has been invited to a birthday party. Typical in childhood? Not for my daughter, because she is autistic.

Previous birthday party invitations occurred because I knew the families and friendships have been carefully nurtured between my daughter and a couple of children.

So I just about shed a tear when my daughter was invited to a birthday party recently by a girl in her class as I had nothing to do with it. Ok truth be told; I wanted to jump for joy! It is a celebratory milestone around my daughter’s social development as she has struggled socially for most of her short life.

Although my daughter was born healthy, in her toddler years some differences became apparent. The older she got the more obvious those differences became. She was disinterested in other children and was non-verbal until the age of three. She communicated through her behaviour which sometimes was inappropriate and was typically misunderstood.

From the outside it was easy to write it off as bad behaviour. But underneath it all was a child who was overwhelmed socially, suffered from high anxiety and could only handle small doses of exposure to situations that were either noisy or unstructured.

Her undesirable behaviour limited our social interactions at a time when most children’s social worlds are expanding. When she was three and a half years old she was diagnosed with ASD – autism spectrum disorder.

At the time of receiving this diagnosis, I was given a booklet about Autism New Zealand, an incorporated society with charitable status. The booklet contained valuable information such as which services to go in the Nelson region for support and assistance as well as information about coffee group meetings that provide links to other families in Nelson/Marlborough with children and teenagers with autism.

I first started attending the local Autism New Zealand coffee group meetings three years ago. It was the coffee group I knew I belonged to as up to then my experiences of motherhood were significantly different to mothers of neurotypical” children. My daughter didn’t reach many of the milestones dictated by parenting books out there. She didn’t sleep through the night until she was five years old. The beginnings of toilet-training were also significantly later and are still a work in progress.

Other children would play alongside each other as toddlers; my daughter would be off exploring the environment or would be fixated on a gadget. It has been incredibly reassuring being able to connect with parents – mainly Mums - who share many of the same challenges as I do.

We might only see each other at coffee group meetings every six weeks but touching base regularly is such an important, if not therapeutic, part of life with a child on the autistic spectrum. Our children are all different ages, and although they all have autism – no two children with autism are the same.

The coffee meetings are a great opportunity to update each other on our children’s progress, to vent if needed and to just meet up with parents who may be living with the same or similar challenges. There is also a lot of information on hand in the form of workshops and seminars which we are lucky to get in our region. Although one child in every hundred is diagnosed with autism, misunderstandings and a lack of knowledge prevail.

A lot of the time autism is stereotyped yet with autism there is no one size fits all. Classic autism is what often springs to mind when autism is mentioned. There is a fascination with it on the big screen, tele and in books - the autism where an individual is seemingly locked in his or her own world, while rocking in a corner. Movies such as Rain Man and television programmes such as The Big Bang Theory feature characters with Aspergers Syndrome – the kind of autism where intelligent but socially quirky individuals reside. These are two examples of autism but there are many different variations in between.

My daughter’s autism can be described as “high functioning”. She didn’t make the diagnosis for Aspergers Syndrome because her onset of speech was delayed. Being a girl puts her in the minority even within the autism arena as typically it is boys that are diagnosed. Although she is challenged socially, she is naturally social yet many think that autistic children aren’t social beings.

Other struggles are to do with sensory processing (she gets tired and overstimulated easily) and managing emotions (she rarely cries). She tends to internalise her emotions so it often appears as if she is doing just fine.

Living with a child with a high functioning autism is a little like living with Jekyll and Hyde. Jekyll participates fairly well in class, progresses academically and is even beginning to make friends during her second year at school. Hyde comes home most days from school jaded, retreats into herself for an hour or two, and can have explosive meltdowns.

Her autism seems to go in cycles. She can have weeks or months of “doing well” – or at least holding it together in the neurotypical world. Then she regresses back to her first language – autism.

During the last three years there has been a team of specialists on board to help with behavioural issues and to ensure mainstream education works. As grateful as I am for the support, it does take a lot of extra time and energy to meet up with all the specialists.

Many strides forward have been made and without a doubt my daughter wouldn’t be doing as well as she is without all the help, but the challenges remain despite the best efforts to manage my daughter’s autism on a day to day basis. Autism is for life and it is important to connect with other families to gain hope and inspiration. That is why an organisation like Autism New Zealand is vital for families such as ours.

The Tahunanui Arts and Crafts Fair, January 2011

In Term Four last year I enrolled in Painting for The Experienced - a community education course run at Waimea College by Jennifer Murphy. Over eight weeks I created several paintings for the Tahunanui Arts and Crafts Fair. I ended up selling 9 pieces of art - including one piece of rock art on the day. Some of the art sold was created over the last couple of years so it was nice to see it go. Always good to see recent paintings brought too.








It was the first time I had a go at creating a trio of art pieces which was a lot of fun - see the farm setting featured below. It is in my daughters bedroom as she wanted to keep the set! I also had a go at painting cartoons for adults - there were just two in this series: "Why the long face Larry?" and "Happy as Larry". One sold at the Tahunanui Arts and Crafts Fair and the other one an interested customer picked up from home after I removed the word Larry so it just read"Why the long face?"

The fair was a lot of fun - there were three of us the stall . Other products featured for sale were tomato plants, key rings and soft-toy dolls and owls. I have applied for a stall in the Mapua Easter Show but haven't received confirmation about that yet.

Tears for Christchurch

It's four days since the massive 6.3 earthquake hit Christchurch - the one described as an aftershock, five months on from the original 7.1 quake that hit in September. It was and is still a shock to the nation - especially to those with strong connections to Canterbury.

Living in Nelson, which is located slightly over 400 kilometres away, we are situated unnervingly close. Not close enough to have felt the quake on Tuesday - though some claimed to have felt the one in September. However many Nelsonians have ties to Christchurch. I don't think I've spoken to one person post-quake who doesn't have friends or family there. There are also residents here in Nelson who either are from Canterbury themselves originally or who have lived there in the short or long-term. Naturally there have been many stories circulating in Nelson about the quake - stories ranging from a lack of power and water in many households to lucky escapes to those who have lost friends or family members.

Somehow this quake has offered me an opportunity to reflect not just on this as a national tragedy - because as New Zealanders we are all affected - but also on my own connections with Christchurch over the years. I have realised I have visited Christchurch at least ten times over the years and most visits involved a walk around the very CBD that has been destroyed by the quake. It is the only part of Christchurch I know my way around.

I've lived in a few spots in this fine country of ours, but Christchurch was never one of the cities I resided in. Originally from the North Island (a Wellingtonian) I have had two spells at living in the South Island. The first was well over fifteen years ago when I spent a year living in Queenstown. I spent a Winter as a "ski-liftie" working on both The Remarkables and Coronet Peak. I had the time of my life - skiing, snowboarding and partying (as you do in Queenstown as a 20-something). I made a pile of friends and lived by the mountain motto which was "Here for a good time, not a long time." We travelled to Christchurch on occasion for a big city fix as sometimes life in Queenstown got a bit insular. One memorable trip was going to see The Village People at The Town Hall.

Several of my Queenstown friends in that era were from Canterbury. Many of them I haven't been in contact with for years. I have thought about them this week. Some I have contacted and have been assured they are safe. Some I know are probably living elsewhere or are overseas. It is funny how in the face of tragedy time and lost friendships don't matter.

As a North Islander I had at least one ski trip growing up with my family to Mt Hutt. I also had a rather memorable trip to Lincoln University as a kind of support person with the Victoria University debating team in the late-80s. Several of us crashed in the living room floor of a flat on Bealey Ave after a night out in Christchurch.

In 1999 I had two trips to Christchurch when living in Wellington. Winter that year I spent a few days in Christchurch with a local friend who was living in Sumner at the time on the way to Queenstown. In late 1999 I remember a drive to Lyttelton with the same friend along Sumner Road - the road that was severely damaged in the quake.

My husband and I have been living in the South Island, in Nelson for over nine years. In that time there we have had a few trips to Christchurch. We went to Canterbury as part of a Dragon Boat Regatta the first two Summers we were here, I was in a half-Marathon that started in the CBD and went through Hagley Park almost nine years ago, and we had a night in Christchurch during our campervan honeymoon holiday around the South Island seven years ago. Our most recent trip was almost two years ago when we took our daughter to see The Wiggles at the Town Hall. We stayed in a motel near town and spent a lot of time walking around the CBD - in Cathedral Square, lunching at The Dux, looking at markets, visiting the museum and walking through Hagley Park. As always Christchurch was picturesque - we enjoyed the gardens, The Avon River and the historical buildings that have always been the landmarks of Christchurch. Christchurch always came across as a non-threatening city with a relaxed attitude.

So although I never lived in Christchurch, I have gotten to know it reasonably well - I've shopped there, dined there, partied on The Strip, walked around the city and visited The Cathedral many times. Many of my visits to Christchurch were connected to events - sporting events, concerts, or to catch up with friends who had either moved to Christchurch or were from Christchurch themselves. Many of my Canterbarian friends had a lot of pride about their city and were more than happy to show me around. There is of course nothing like seeing a city through a locals eyes. So it is these friends that I think about at this time - even if many of them are long gone from my life; they will always be linked to Christchurch.

I know Christchurch will never be the same - in the way it looks even after rebuilding it and the memory of this quake will linger for years to come. But I know the people there are strong and will get through this despite all that has been thrown their way this week. I have tears for Christchurch on many levels - the city, the people, the history. For the average New Zealander this whole disaster feels a little too close to home, as we are a small country and this is a first for us - to be in a national state of emergency. I know some Canterbarians have left either temporarily or for good. Some have come to Nelson.

In the meantime the rest of the country carries on with life while waiting for updates and hoping for more positive news. The truth is most of us can do very little and so it feels odd to continue with life - to go to work, to the gym, drop off and pick my daughter up from school when I know so many Canterbarians have had their lives disrupted. Like 9/11, I think I will always remember where I was when I heard about the quake - in the car on the way to the gym and then at the gym I realised just how serious the quake was as live images were aired on the tvs at the gym. I finished my work-out with a sinking feeling, knowing that the footage of men and women who were physically harmed as they emerged from destroyed buildings was only the beginning - the beginning of a horror of a week that no Kiwi will forget in a hurry.