Feeding small minds

"New Mum On The Block "
Nelson District Parent Centre Newsletter March/April 2008

Education in the formative years is all about play. Luckily I have always been a child at heart so play isn't something I find hard to do. However I realised early on that I wasn't going to be enough to keep my girl stimulated and started taking Amelia to the Playgroup at the Tahunanui Community Centre at the age of six months. She is almost three so has been going for two and a half years, twice a week for up to two hours a time.

It has been the most amazing place for both myself and Amelia. It is an excellent stepping stone to either Kindy or preschool as young tots are exposed to a wide array of play areas (over twenty) to fuel their sponge-like minds as well as the opportunity to socialise with children in the birth to four age range. Amelia will be starting afternoon Kindy this year and I am confident she will be ready as her time at Playgroup has been such a positive time of learning for her.

Amelia has also been going to Tots 'n Tunes at St Stephens church in Tahunanui for two and a half years. It has been incredibly rewarding watching her grow from an anxious six month old to a confident preschooler who now knows many of the songs and actions.

Amelia has also had swimming lessons for over a year. We've also done two terms of gymnastics. Any class with children in it has to be a positive thing. They learn so much from following instruction and taking social cues off other children. Not to mention they have a ball. It is crucial, I would say, that education for the preschooler is centred around fun.

Weekly playdates are also on the agenda and the one-on-one time has been an important aspect of Amelia's social development. Concepts such as sharing and playing nice are able to be taught a little easier with just two children rather than in a group.

All parents have the overwhelming responsibility to make sure our children are stimulated across the spectrum. And us at-home Mums have the added pressure of orchestrating interesting activities for our children often seven days of the week.

Earlier today I created several lists to encourage my husband and myself to shake things up a bit at home. They include “physical fun at home”, “physical adventures outside of the home”, “ideas for socialising”, “indoor quiet play”, and “indoor active play.” Most of the ideas listed have been tried and tested by many a Mum, so aren't highly original. But somehow starting the lists has inspired me to think of some new ideas. It was an affirmation that Amelia is getting her needs met at home but we could certainly do more – and have some fun at the same time!

It is easy to get stuck in the same old patterns and then to wonder why your preschooler is mooching around the house. I've just clicked recently that being an at-home Mum can be as creative a job as I want it to be. So now I have these lists started, I hope to move from average to great Mum status. I want to look back at these precious preschool years and know I really did the best I could with Amelia. It is easy to think that our children can only be stimulated in an educational setting but I don't think that's true. They certainly need to socialise with other children. Yet there is plenty we can do as parents to keep our children fresh and interested – it just involves thinking outside the square a little.

Learned behaviour is big with children and as parents we are modeling life as we know it to our children.

What are we teaching our children about marriage/love, family, nutrition, self-care, self-love? Do we eat well, love ourselves and demonstrate we care deeply about our nearest and dearest? What about finances? Are we living within our means? And our addictions? Are they in front of our children's faces demonstrating that they are acceptable to us and therefore acceptable to them? Do we follow our dreams and live passionate lives or have we given in and settled with our lot?

It's important to teach our children family values. Seated dinners every night have taught Amelia that eating nutritious food together every evening is a time for companionship and fun. We tag-team a lot as parents during the week so I personally love the fact that there is this one time in the day when I know we'll all be together.

There is nothing like the words of an almost three year old coming back at you to confirm that you are on the right – or wrong track. It was so pleasing to hear my daughter politely ask for an icecream the other day “Yes, please mummy” she said when I asked if she wanted one, “Thanks, mummy” when it was handed to her followed by a “delicious” when we sat down in a civilised manner in the icecream palour.

Then there are the words, although not bad, that make me cringe upon hearing them parrotted back such as “for goodness sakes!” whenever it appears I might be frustrated about something. There is no doubt that modeling is the most powerful form of learning for a young child's mind.

What a hard job it is to be a parent with those little watchful eyes taking in everything we do - no-one is perfect. I'm certainly not. I'm well aware my daughter in her short life has been exposed to many of my human flaws. But there's always room for improvement.